Shay Cook [00:00:02]:
Everybody got some kind of journey to get to that good place, but we're not seeing all of that. And so then you start seeing, oh, I gotta see that girl with that on and that on. They went to that vacation. They did that, they did that. And then you start feeling, ugh, the guilt. You start feeling depressed, the emotions. You're like, Hey, Lord, I want that. I want that.
 
Shay Cook [00:00:23]:
Let me go on this website and try to buy this for my house, make my house look like this and all that. It gets in the way, y'all. It's a distraction. Gotta have discipline. Gotta have discipline. I always say clients need to learn when we're teaching them or we want them to learn, but also people that I just want to be an influence, like discipline, self control, and sacrifice in order to get to that goal, whatever it may be; those things are key.
 
Shay Cook [00:00:50]:
Ever felt those awkward vibes? When religion and money come up, you're not alone. Welcome to Yahweh's Money, the podcast where we tackle the crossroads worlds of faith and finance. I'm Shay Cook, an accredited financial counselor and the CEO and founder of Crusaders for Change, LLC. Join us on our journey as we discuss topics like tithing, saving, and conquering debt through religious perspectives. Let's get started. 
 
Shay Cook [00:01:19]:
Hey, world Man. Welcome back to another episode of Yahweh's Money. We are standing on the throne threshold of a massive Milestone: episode 100.
 
Shay Cook [00:01:30]:
This episode today is episode 99. It's talking about the Heart's Ledger, recapping season four, which was absolutely amazing. Thank you, Jesus. And confronting the numbness of spending. So I got a lot to share with y'all today. But before we cross that line, we have to do the AAR for our military people out there. What is that After Action Reflection.
 
Shay Cook [00:01:53]:
Not report. Reflection on the heart. Throughout season four, we've talked about military discipline, legacy, and stewardship. But today, the guests are off mic. Ain't nobody up here but me. It's just you and me, y'all. The world listening to Yahweh's money.
 
Shay Cook [00:02:11]:
Oh, my God. I'm so grateful. I'm pulling back the curtain on the silent budget killers. Financial distraction and emotional numbing. Why do we use the hustle to hide from our problems? The mall, Amazon to soothe our souls. It's time to stop filling a spiritual void with a physical transaction, y'all. It's really, really.
 
Shay Cook [00:02:39]:
It's time. It's time to stop filling a spiritual void with a physical transaction. I had to say that again because, man, I do it. I am guilty and a lot of us are. So our main scripture today is Haggai 1 6. You have planted much, but harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes but are not warm.
 
Shay Cook [00:03:07]:
You earn wages only to put them into a purse with holes in it. Oh, Lord. This is a biblical and I would say, spiritual definition of financial numbing. We try to solve internal hunger with external harvest. Whether it's clothes that don't feel secure or the wages that disappear into the purse with holes, the message is clear. When we use money to distract us from our true spiritual state, we never have enough. To be wealthy within means repairing the holes in the heart, not just adding more coins to the purse. Lord, I need y'all to sit into that.
 
Shay Cook [00:03:51]:
Sit in that for a minute. I'm gonna say that again. Whether it's clothes that don't make you feel secure or wages that disappear into the purse with holes, this message is clear. When we use money to distract us from our true spiritual state, we never have enough, y'alll. I am there. I've been there, constantly chasing that money, fame, power, but you never feel like you have enough. But to be wealthy within means repairing the holes in the heart and in the soul.
 
Shay Cook [00:04:27]:
Not just adding more coins to the purse. Just adding more money doesn't mean that you gonna feel even more. You're not. So reflecting on the silent era of stewardship, which we discussed with my father in episode 94 and the legacy work with my mother in episode 93. Your finances are a mirror of your heart. I'm sharing my own heart today on how we can stop spending, to forget, and start investing to heal. So let's get into our rapid fire questions, y', all, with my self. 
 
Rapid Fire Questions Jingle [00:05:00]:
Take your seat. Let the wisdom inherit. Let’s hit the rapid fire questions. Say, what's on your spirit? Take your seat. Let the wisdom inherit. Let’s hit the rapid fire questions. Say what's on your spirit? 
 
Shay Cook [00:05:27]:
All right, so what is one guilty pleasure I reach for in the moment I feel unappreciated or stressed. It really goes with where I am in the era of my life, or where I've been in the era of my life. But right now, in the last few months, probably last year, it has been food, man. And just buying food and not even worrying about it at the end of the month, like, oh, my God, I done spent like hundreds, if not a thousand plus dollars on food. And I'm just going to put it out there.
 
Shay Cook [00:05:55]:
When Kamala lost in ‘24 and I'm not even going to discuss who won and what all that happened, because we don't. Right. I said, I don't give an F. I just gave up with not life. I still kept on with life. I'm still here. Thank you, Jesus. But I was just eating whatever I wanted, spending all the money on the food because I felt stressed by that moment.
 
Shay Cook [00:06:19]:
That was a pivotal moment in America that we're still dealing with. I turned to food. All right, next question. I am staying late at the office because the mission requires it or because I don't want to face the silence at home. My home ain't silent, y'all. I got my husband, my daughter here. We got a lot going on.
 
Shay Cook [00:06:36]:
But really, I'm saying because work right now distracts me. Just like I said, that guilty pleasure of food. Work has become a great distractor for all the stress and craziness in the world. So for me, it's not even about the money. Of course, money helps, is a tool, but the money ain't the reason why I'm being distracted. And how I've been dealing with stress has been food and work. And lastly, if I had to stop spending money once for 30 days, what emotions would bubble to the surface? Oh, Lord, y'all.
 
Shay Cook [00:07:11]:
The reality that I need to take better care of my body, of my temple, that God gave me emotions of probably displeasure, of emotions just feeling sad, probably depression, anxiety would bubble up. They already do on many occasions. But just being real with y'all, to me, it ain't the money. If I had to stop working, man, that's what would happen. But stop spending money, because I don't spend money like I should. And I don't know people like, ah, you mean you should. I need to be spending more money on myself, but I make sure, you know, the business and family. Unfortunately, sometimes the business before the family.
 
Shay Cook [00:07:50]:
I admit that. Lord, forgive me. I always tell people that I ain't cheating on my husband or my family with nobody but Crusaders for Change. So, unfortunately, I'd be having an affair with C4C. But, you know, it's life. And sometimes we place things, whether it's money, it's sex, it's fame, it's power, it's whatever it may be to avoid those emotions. All right, let's get into the main discussion of recapping the journey, taking the soldier's sentinel mindset from my brother's episode, Mitchell's episode 97, and applying it to our emotions. Are you guarding the gate to your bank account or letting retail therapy.
 
Shay Cook [00:08:30]:
Just walk right in. I know many people out there. You know, from the clients that we serve to people in my family, my friends, circles, business associates, we are really distracted or and purposely, intentionally. But sometimes just because. Because the world is ugly. You know, my sister and I talk about this often. She went over to beautiful Europe, and when she got back here, she was saying how America is the ghetto. And I'm sure she would be mad to say that, because America right now is the ghetto and has been the ghetto probably for the 250 years that has been. I am proud to be an American most days.
 
Shay Cook [00:09:11]:
That's another conversation. But we are young, and we are like toddlers compared to the rest of the world. And we are like teenagers compared to the rest of the world. And all of the stress that's going on in this world, I want to honor it in this moment of 2026. April 1st is the day I'm recording this. So whenever you're listening to this next week or next year or next 10 years, ‘26, we're going to put a marker. Has been hard. ‘25 was hard.
 
Shay Cook [00:09:34]:
This decade, this man, it's been hard. So that's the global stress. That's the nation's stress. That's the political stress. That's the environmental stress. That's the school and professional stress, wherever you are in your life. But then you get into your house and you're like that stress comes down. And if you're not protecting your house and your spirit and your mind, that comes in and then it starts to affect you, right? And so we get distracted by all of that.
 
Shay Cook [00:10:02]:
And then we have to lean on, hopefully, God for most of y' all or everybody. And that's what Yahweh's Money is, God's money, right? He owns this. We're just here as stewards, as I say, all the time. But that distracts us. And if you don't have the discipline, y'all. Amazon be getting the most of me back in the day. I've been really cutting back in ‘26, 25 again after what happened. In the political climate, I was not only eating a lot, I was buying a lot.
 
Shay Cook [00:10:32]:
Amazon, was that retail therapy? I don't go to malls like I used to. There was a time in my life in, like, my 20s when we were living in Omaha, Nebraska, and I was going through some stress, whether it was marital stress, just growing up, you had a young child. And every time I got a little bonus from the credit union I was working for in Omaha, I would go straight to the mall, go buy my bras and panties from Victoria's Secret. Just eating, buying food, you know, instead of dealing with those emotions, instead of going to therapy, instead of talking to God, my Counselor, my Father, Jesus Christ about my issues, I went out there and just bought stuff. In cycles of my life where I realized depression, anxiety is kicking in because I'll start turning to those bad behaviors. You know, a little retail therapy ain't bad. But again, instead of getting on my knees and praying to God I was out there spending all that money, racking up debt, credit cards and stuff. So thank God I learned over time how to deal with that.
 
Shay Cook [00:11:33]:
But I am still human. Even at 47 years old, I still do that. I still go through my cycles of depression and anxiety and want to just pull up the phone and start shopping. You know, whether it's Amazon, Dijonna, Ruggable. I love buying stuff for my house. You know, Wayfair went crazy with Wayfair. I ain't gonna lie. That stuff is distracting.
 
Shay Cook [00:11:56]:
And then I am. I'm gonna go even deeper. YouTube, man. I go down YouTube, social media. I've been there, too, going down that social media road. We buying stuff on social media, looking at everybody's life, everybody doing well, everybody doing. Everybody got some kind of journey to get to that good place, but we're not seeing all of that. And so then you're starting to, oh, I gotta see that girl with that on and that on.
 
Shay Cook [00:12:15]:
They went to that vacation. They did that, they did that. And then you start feeling. Oh, the guilt. You start feeling depressed, the emotions. You're like, hey, Lord, I want that. I want that. Let me go on this website and try to buy this for my house, make my house look like this.
 
Shay Cook [00:12:31]:
And all that gets in the way, y'all, It's a distraction. Gotta have discipline. Gotta have discipline. I always say clients need to learn when we're teaching them or we want them to learn, but also people that I just want to be able to influence, like discipline, self control, and self sacrifice in order to get to that goal, whatever it may be. Those things are key. So what about, you know, this anatomy and numbing? Like, we're wanting to numb, and that's what we're doing. We're buying all this stuff.
 
Shay Cook [00:13:00]:
And you got the packages coming in every day. I've been there, done that. You got the packages coming in every day. You know, you're putting on a new clothes, you're setting up the house. You're going on these beautiful vacations again. No shame. I do all of this, okay? And so you're doing all of that. Then when you really sit on it, when you really sit in it, whether it's on the toilet, I ain't gonna lie.
 
Shay Cook [00:13:22]:
Sometimes you sit on that toilet and the motion start hitting you in the shower, it start hitting you in the bed. You about to try to go to sleep, all that stuff start coming in you. No, I don't want none of that. Okay? So let me get on this phone, look at this YouTube, these dogs and these babies making me laugh. Checking out Beyonce and Sia and all, you know, the pop artists and R&B artists and all that. Let me get into these videos. Something to numb me, okay? Let me keep buying this food that I know is not healthy for me, but it makes me feel good when I'm eating that burger, okay? When I'm eating this, when I'm eating that, there's a hit of dopamine. And when you're trying to fight against the cortisols, the stress, there's that hit that you get from that adrenaline.
 
Shay Cook [00:14:04]:
But then what's the regret? You got long term debt, got all this credit card debt, you still sad. You got all this stuff in your house, you are still depressed. You got to really sit in it. You got to really sit in it. Because when you sit in it and you start doing the work, things start to change. And then let's talk about this hustle culture, right? Why we praise the hustle so much in this culture, even when it's hurting our families. Is your work an ethic of fruit of spirit or a shield against your feelings? I'm referencing James Green check, episode 90. He started talking about that. We hustle.
 
Shay Cook [00:14:39]:
I am hustle number one over here. This woman right here, she hustles, she does a lot of work. But, man, how does that hurt you? How does that hurt your family? I'm just going to use me as an example. I'm not going to talk. Nobody but me, okay? This is me and y'all. I'm hustling, I'm hustling, I'm hustling. I'm working, I'm working, I'm working.
 
Shay Cook [00:14:57]:
I've been doing this 30 plus years. I'm only 47, been working all my life, okay? And I'm not even trying to keep up with the Joneses, the Kardashians or the Carters is what I always say. I'm trying to keep up with my own self inside in this DNA of mine, praising my ancestors, you know, out there that are working hard on black women that been working hard. My mama, my grandmother, everybody. My aunts and uncles, sister, even my daughter, now 25 years old, working hard. Working hard. Working hard for what? What are we working so hard for? We want to get our name out there, brand our business. Everybody know our name.
 
Shay Cook [00:15:28]:
Everybody know Crusaders for Change, right? Everybody know our business. Professional business, not personal, right? But sometimes even personal, we putting it out there. Everybody know I went on this vacation. Everybody know I gave to this organization. Everybody know I was out in these streets doing this. I was out in these streets doing that. And then you get home, and again, you ain't got hardly any money in your bank account. Or you may.
 
Shay Cook [00:15:50]:
You might. You might be doing that. You might be really managing that money, right? God's money, Yahweh's Money. But you still ain't happy. Your feelings are still like, what? What I do all that for? I've been chasing. I'm on this hamster wheel, chasing this. Crusades for Change is turning 10 years this year, and thank you, Jesus. And I still feel like we could have done a lot more.
 
Shay Cook [00:16:13]:
And I know we got a lot more ahead of us because I serve an amazing God, and he's doing his thing, but he's trying to teach Shay a lesson here. This ain't yours. This ain't yours. I gave you not only the name and the business and all of the talents and all of that, and the people, Adriana, you know what I mean? Bethany, Alana, Dawn, Mr. Hutton, all of them, all of the people of The Well and Central Maryland Chamber, all these great organizations helping me, supporting me, SBDC, all these. I mean, I can go on and on and on, shouting out the contracts out there, you know, the vendors, all of that. All these people come in and make this thing happen. Not just Shay
 
Shay Cook [00:16:48]:
And I'm leading, hopefully in step with God and obeying him, but I'm still as a human in flesh. Like, I gotta hustle. I was 800 hours a week, and be proud of that. I worked 100 hours a week. I am tired, y'all at the end of the week, I'm sitting around a house, being invited all kinds of events. Can't even make it because I'm tired.
 
Shay Cook [00:17:09]:
Why? Mm, mm, mm. Now, let's talk about this financial honesty, right? We avoid the bank statement because the numbers tell the truth about where we are seeking comfort. We need to move from vision to victory by implementing that grit, right? Like Dawn talked about in episode 95, y'all. You look at your bank statement, you look at your online banking. You know, what's important to you? Is it food? Is it clothes? Is it video games, magazines? Back in the day, right, I'm going. I'm going to date myself, you know, but back in the day, that was the thing, buying lots of magazines, right? CDs, you know, back in the day, streaming music, all of the extra purchases when you're playing a game, you know how they get you electronic equipment, stuff in your house, shoes, I’m going to call out my husband, bourbon, whiskey.
 
Shay Cook [00:18:00]:
What is it? What is it that when you look at your bank account, you see that over and over and over? Shay was Amazon. Shay was food, man. That food, man. Ordering it was doordash. And I know some of y'all like, I ain't doing no doordash. Grubhub, man. That convenience, y'all, that convenience.
 
Shay Cook [00:18:21]:
Because guess what? While I'm trying to hustle all hard and work all hard, doordash makes it easy for me to get that food and keep moving. That convenience. It's crazy. I would say the devil has something to do with that. And keep you distracted from God's favor, from God's blessings, from just all God's goodness. That's a distraction. God don't want us to be distracted. He wants us to be focused. We have a very clear mission as Christians.
 
Shay Cook [00:18:52]:
I'll speak from specifically to share the word, share the gospel, bring God's people or the people to God. But we're so focused on ourselves. Let me get into that a little bit. We're so selfish. We just think about ourselves. Lord, I am guilty. I'm thinking about Crusaders for Change every day, all day. And then every once in a while, little breakthrough comes in, like, oh, wait a minute, Shay, you getting a little too heavy.
 
Shay Cook [00:19:18]:
Putting on a little too much weight. Cause all that food is distracting you, right? All that stuff that you use to distract you. You need to get yourself together. So I started doing that. So I'm like pushing and pulling, pushing and pulling, trying to figure this out. It ain't easy. The flesh is real, but so is spirit and faith, you know? According to the study of Psychology Today, or Bias study from psychology day, approximately 40% of Americans admit to compulsive shopping or using spending as a primary coping mechanism. Venture to say that's pretty systematic or systemic.
 
Shay Cook [00:19:52]:
They want that. Okay, that keeps the 1% wealthy. I'm just going to put it out there, right? And then there's another study from the American Psychological association that says workaholicism is frequently used to avoid underlying mental health issues. This proves a busy schedule is often a busy heart trying to outrun pain, y'all. We keep on our schedules, I was about to say lit. We keep on our schedules crowded and crazy, because we are trying to outrun our pain.
 
Shay Cook [00:20:26]:
For me, is that depression, anxiety, because when I sit in it, like I said earlier, when I sit down on the couch at the table, and if I ain't got a device in my hand, looking at the news or all the crazy mess going on in the world or looking at a show on Netflix, Hulu, wherever, or reading something, a book, my mind starts to wander, and then the real emotions start to come. We got to stay away from that. We've traveled a long way this season, and I'm so proud of it. I'm going to say from the barracks to the boardroom, but we really need to understand that the bank account cannot fix what your soul is missing. You are more than your productivity. You are worth more than your purchases. We traveled a long way, y'all.
 
Shay Cook [00:21:15]:
Season four, wow. Best season yet. Amazing, amazing guests. So thank you to everyone, even from season one to two to three, but especially season four, especially Bethany Hawkins, our podcast producer, now our partner success manager. She's an employee, y’all. Doing great things within Crusaders for change. Super proud.
 
Shay Cook [00:21:37]:
Adriana Lopez. Shouting you, shouting you out, lead financial counselor. Just a joy; ride or die. Just joy and just. I love that my team is not about just pacifying. They're about really leading me. Like, nah, Shay, we need to do this.
 
Shay Cook [00:21:52]:
And nah Shay, this is great. Or no, can we think about this? Oh, this is a great idea. That's the kind of people you need in your life to accomplish all that we're talking about today to deal with you. If you're really having some pain and some stress and some anxiety, depression, and beyond, you really need to have people in your life that are gonna say, you know what? You need to go talk to somebody and you all need to listen. Because I done told many people that they need to get help, and they don't get help, and then they have some kind of major breakdown. And I'm not gonna ever say, I told you so in them cases, but you need help. She my own daughter. Be like, when you talk to your therapist, when's the last time you talked to your therapist? Been in therapy since I was 19, y'.all
 
Shay Cook [00:22:30]:
Off and on since 19. Two degrees in psychology. Because I truly believe we need to be taking care of our mental health, our physical brain health, our physical body health, our souls, connecting that to a spirit through Jesus Christ, preferably. Cause that's who I love. But thank you again for joining us on this journey. As we head into season five with a heart that is full, you know, we want to also have our purses full. So I think our season five, I think we decided on having it start at either late August, September.
 
Shay Cook [00:23:07]:
So for y' all that are joining us, thank you again. I'm excited about season 5. I'm excited about 10 plus years of Crusaders for Change. I'm excited about all of that. Just want to share some call to actions real quick. Please perform a spending audit. Look at your last 30 days of transactions. Circle the ones made out of boredom, sadness or stress.
 
Shay Cook [00:23:31]:
Total that up. This is the tax you are paying for your stress. Wow. Okay, let's think about that, right? I mean, if I had to put it out there, I'm thinking about 30, 40% of my spending is because of the tax of my stress, if not more. And then additionally spend 15 minutes in total silence this week. No phone, no work, no shopping. And ask God, what am I trying to hide from my busyness? Pray for the courage to be still, y'all.
 
Shay Cook [00:24:00]:
Be still and know that I am God. Key spiritual verse: Be still and know that I'm God. It's very important because you connect with God. He's gonna help you center, but you also have to be obedient. Not only are you gonna have people around your life, hopefully, and you already do, you're just not listening that are telling you what you need to do and to help you, giving you that good old wisdom and advice, God's going to give it to you too. But it ultimately comes down to us listening and obeying. Right? We need to obey and I'm talking to myself. We need to listen to and obey.
 
Shay Cook [00:24:37]:
It's time, y'all. ‘25, ‘26. Whoa. You know, we got conflicts going on. Environmental issues, political issues, economic issues, people issues, relationship issues, business issues, issues, issues, issues. But I know my God, they're still giving out miracles. This is amazing.
 
Shay Cook [00:24:56]:
And I would not be here. Shay Cook would not be here. Crusades for Change would not be here. My family, friends, colleagues, employees, contractors, none of that would be here without Him. And we got a great event coming up. I'm just going to mention it. So if you're listening to this before May 1, 2026, please check out and attend our annual Tickle My Money Bone. This is our sixth annual and we're also going to be celebrating our 10 year anniversary.
 
Shay Cook [00:25:22]:
So I'm excited about that. You can go to crusaders4change.org/TMMB Tickle My Money Bone. Yes, it's a crazy name, but and it's registered. Thank you Jesus. But it signifies that we're going to tickle that bone that we have in us, which is signifies or shows that we do not talk enough about money. We talk about sex, politics, and I would even say religion before we talk about our financial situations. So we need to talk about that. And I'm just again, super proud to be here.
 
Shay Cook [00:25:56]:
Super proud to be the host of Yahweh's Money and this opportunity to talk to you all about God's money, the crossroads of God's money and all the things that we need to be doing. So thank you for all you're doing out there. Keep striving. Take care. 
 
Shay Cook [00:26:17]:
A big thank you for listening to this episode. We hope you found today's chat about the intersection of religion and money insightful. We would love to hear your feedback. Hit that subscribe button or follow the podcast.
 
Shay Cook [00:26:30]:
And please feel free to leave us a review for the latest Yahweh's Money content. Visit us at Crusaders4change.org or find us anywhere you listen to podcasts. Until next time, stay financially fit and spiritually inspired. And remember, it's always better Yahweh's way.